I don’t know what to tell you, my friend.
Things have gotten rough, and for a little bit there I thought I might even be headed into some sort of a breakdown.
There have been a lot of pressures on me. Some I have shared. Some I haven’t.
I’ve been thinking aboout this blog. What is its purpose? Who is my audience? Why do I write it?
The answers to such questions have shifted over time, sometimes from post to post.
Sometimes I wrote with the idea I might be helping people to draw closer to God.
Sometimes I wrote to get something off my chest, sometimes to work through things I didn’t quite understand.
Sometimes I wrote from pride, wanting to impress, wanting to show off.
Sometimes I stopped myself from sharing things I thought would offend certain readers. Sometimes I wrote things that I knew would touch particular readers.
I don’t feel like sharing all that is on my mind, all that is on my heart, right now.
I know that I want to be the best at what is important.
I think there are things at risk in my life right now. My health, my family, my sanity.
So... here is this strange little post that I think may mark a shift in this blog.
I want to write about the things that I think are important, but only when I think I have the dicretionary time, and the proper inclination.
I’m no longer going to worry about trying to get two posts a week out. Instead, I am going to listen to heart, keep things in perspective.
I’m not goinng to work twice as many hours as I sleep. I’m not going to run my tank empty at work and other pursuits and give my family the dregs.
I’m not sure where this is going, but I’m not going to be overly concerned about what others think who read this blog.