Wednesday, March 01, 2006
I’m looking at a jar of charred wood. It is from an eave of my church, near the spot where my son was playing with fire.
Within a year or so a new building will rise where the old one stood. Something new out of the ashes.
I watched The Passion last night. My children did not come with me. That is OK. I am humbled once again at the enormity of God’s love. I will watch it again on Good Friday. I am humbled that out the greatest horror, the greatest of sins, when men had the audacity to lay hands upon God incarnate, the Lord made something wonderful happen.
Humbled that He would do that, and include me in that grace.
I’m reading a passage from the Bible tonight...
If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from His love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. --Philippians 2:1-3
There has been discouragement this past year, and encouragement. Discomfort and comfort. There have been tears and joys.
Most of this passage is pretty easy to take. But that last part... “...Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.”
That’s a little tougher.
I have tried to be humble. In fact, I think I am a little proud of my humility.
I call myself Curious Servant. That is how I want to be known. Look at me! See how humble I am!
I’m sitting here with a cross on my forehead, made of the ashes from our burned church.
I strut through my life, trying to be great, and it’s all foolishness. I want to help shape the new look of our school. I want to run my tv show and after school clubs and lead a Sunday school class... and why is that? Is it all because of a desire to serve? Or do I crave attention?
Is there anything I have that I should be proud of? Is there anything I do, or think, or create, or make, or feel, that makes me special? Or is everything I have a gift from my Lord? Isn’t all I have, when it is at its best, at its purest, at its most wholesome, of God and not of me?
This isn’t going to be long post. I don’t want to put a lot of lovely words together.
I want to just record a few thoughts tonight before I go to bed.
God loves me despite my arrogance, despite my pride. He is pleased most when I use His grace to honor Him.
That is all. That is everything.
I want to be an honest servant.
I need to seek opportunities to quietly wash feet.