Sunday, February 04, 2007

My Kids

My children won’t be senators or CEOs or even college graduates.

I once dreamt of raising children who loved to read and to think and be creative.

Things didn’t turn out that way.

Sometimes I’m around folks who talk about their kids, being on the honor roll, the football team, being the homecoming queen, or a myriad of other social measurements which make parents proud.

My children haven’t high IQs. In fact my older son’s psychologist says it is amazing he is verbal with the scores he has.

One thing they do have is heart. They care deeply about others. Jeremiah has more friends than any other kid I know. Isaac is so careful about people's feelings, and about following every rule. He won’t jaywalk or ride his bike on the wrong side of the street.

I was watching them today. We were at a regional competition for Special Olympics basketball. Jeremiah was so animated, moving about the court, blocking passes, making shots. He was smiling so broadly. Glad to be with friends. Glad to have Dad there. Isaac was moving quietly around the edges of the crowds, taking pictures, interacting little with others, but I could tell he was having a good time in his own shy way.

While I watched, listening to my iPod and swinging the camera up now and then to catch an interesting shot, I thought about what I might write about them in a blog post, the post I am writing at this moment.

Would I say that I am proud? “Proud” is the term most people would say when experiencing what I am feeling. I don’t think it is the right word.

First, I don’t think I have much to be proud of. Pride comes from being pleased with one’s own accomplishments. Though I believe Jeremiah performs so far out of his expected range partly because as parents we have always demanded he try his hardest at all he does, the majority of what he succeeds at is his own doing, not mine.

Secondly, much of the blessings I receive because of my children are really gifts. Again nothing I have earned or should feel pride for.

So “pride” isn’t the correct word.

I think the best words to describe how I feel about my kids are "love" and "joy". My heart quickens when I watch them, it swells up and I feel a little giddy in an awkward middle aged sort of way.

They bring me joy by being kind, thoughtful, generous. They make me happy by suddenly giving me a hug or asking I come pray over them at bedtime. I love those boys more dearly than I love my own life.

I haven’t really much more to say at this moment (or at least this post, I have already written other posts which I plan on uploading in a day or two).

I may not be bragging, but permit me the digital equivalent of pulling out my wallet and showing you a couple of the greatest kids around.

Good block Jeremiah!

Is that a smile you're wearing, Isaac?

Nice shot Jeremiah!

Gramma came (MIL)

Dad giving mom a hug (from Isaac's perch)


Looney Mom said...

Yup. You're a "proud" papa, you are. You should be. Obviously they've had great guidance along the way. You and your wife are blessed.

Deborah and Sally said...

I don't think you could've said it better !
Kids are such a blessing and really do fill the heart with love and joy.
I'm sure we do the same for our heavenly Father !

Me said...

If we could all remember to focus on such wonderful essentials and remember that all the rest as Paul would say is 'nothing.' Life would definitely be better.

You are, quite clearly, a very good father.

Ame said...

this is warm and encouraging to me. when we learned of the "whats" of my special needs little girl, we were in the middle of all the marriage mess. thrown into working thru that and my parents at the same time, personally working thru the emotions of my precious daughter have been delayed. i find myself experiencing moments of grieving intermittantly thru my days. her last "what," or diagnosis, has been especially hard for me to process. i look at her, so beautiful, so "normal" in all appearances, but i know that she lives in a different realm of "normal." the school has been so good with her; her ARD's amaze me; her teacher got a student teacher this semester, I know mostly so she could have more time with my daugher, and she is spending extra time after school with her. she takes three different combinations of meds three different times a day, and then some more sometimes, and it's a constant balance, a constant everything, and a few different specialists. and what i feel is love. and joy . . . as i work thru what "is" while somewhere inside me i let the layers of her future abilities and inabilities gently unfold in my heart.

her older sister is sick this morning. early, she turned to me and said, "momma, i prayed for sissy."

Suzanne said...

Thank you for such a beautiful post on gratefulness and loving your children! There are times that I feel just as you do. My children may never be one of the "worldly greats," and certainly, there is nothing wrong with that as long as it is in the context of owing it to working things out through Faith and Love of God, however, there are many "greats" that the world doesn't hear about very often...such as St. Therese of the Little Flower and on and on..doing little things with great love!
I want this for my children more than anything...whatever they do or become, do it all with love and gratefulness to HIM, work with HIM,
know it is okay to accomplish the good with HIM...let the ego down and do it all with and for HIM! AMEN!

David said...

Just an old friends stopping by to say hello.

Jada's Gigi said...

My granddaughter fills me with a love and a joy that even my children cannot is incredible to be enabled to care so much...

squirrel said...

What a wonderful famliy you have, it's great to see your pictures!

jel said...

bet that was good to be watching

looked like he was having fun there!

MrJ said...

Nick's IQ is 65. But he is handsome....and athletic. His mood changes every ten minutes and I have friends that are scared for my life. But he is my son. And I love him. He may never hold a job, he may not be able to write or do any great math calculations. He has demonstrated extraordinary athletic skills, but he does not have a head or brain to match. I believe God can do great miracles, I believe that Nicholas' can be healed, but our Lord has demonstrated that it is not his will. I accept it..but one day we will all be walking with perfection in heaven, not our cursed bodies that are the result of original sin.

Peace Bro,

bjk said...

Well.....your kids are loved.....that speaks volumes to them.....

Felisol said...

Dear Curious Servant,
I think you should be proud because you and your wife have managed to create an accepting environment for your two boys to grow up, develope and thrive in. That takes a lot of dayly effort, planning, supporting and considering that only caring, loving parents can provide.
I'm not familiar or impressed with the American system of honour rolls, homecoming queens or whatever can be used to segregate the As from theBs.
We of course have grades in Norway too, but both teachers and studenta are encouraged to develope according one's own potential instead of being suprsttudents.
(Then again grades do count when going to university. But everybody can collect additional points by woring or taking other subject. Best of all; the students get scholarships and longterm students loans not related to profession or grade.
In Norway everybody can afford to go to "Harvard".)
Your sons have the best opprtunities to get a good life, because they will always be loved and cared for.
Doesn't that count for more than honour roll?
If there were honour rolls for parents, you would both be there.

Kathleen Marie said...

What a fabulous story of a father's love for his children. This is such a blessing and what a fabulous testimony you are to other father's out there.

God Bless You!

Bruce said...

Joy and Love - you've changed my perspective of my own daughter. Thanks again for a wonderful post.


Anonymous said...

We know that feeling. :-) How well you've said it, CS.


Judas Hate said...

Jeremiah and Isaac are beautiful, wonderful boys!

Pride is also experienced when witnesing the achievements of those we love dearly. I think that's the best kind of pride. An unselfish, joyous, loving pride.

Selfish pride isn't that bad either. Look at where they were when you and Brenda embraced them into your lives and hearts.

Look at where they are now. These opportunities were made possible because of you both.

A pure, honest, loving, giving heart and soul wins hands down over a high IQ every time.

Be proud, my Brother. For them and for you.



Kathleen Marie said...

You have been nominated! Stop on over and read all about it!

God Bless!

curious servant said...

Folks... These comments have meant so much to me!

Today has been a trying day. I worked very hard today, and suddenly the strain of things seems particularly heavy.

To come home and check on these comments has buoyed me.

I intended to write a comment to each of you and then visit all of you.

But I think I am going to slow down a bit this evening.

I wrote another post yesterday, and I'll probably toss that into to blog in the morning...

But there is something on my mind, a memory of a trip I took over 35 years ago, that is coming to mind over and over and I think I might try and get the feelings out by writing it down. I might put it in the blog, I don't know.

I'm not twitching and barking or anything like that, but I think I need to open the little pressure relief valve on the side of my old noggin' a bit.

Well... this comment is nearly a post! Thanks to all who have visited today. I will try to get around to visiting all of you very soon.

Your friend...

Vicki said...

"We all grow best in sunshine and love." I see your boys thriving well because they live in the sunshine of your love.