Had a headache.
Actually, I have a headache. It’s day three of it, but oh what a difference. I would say the pain has gone from “Somebody shoot me!” to “Gosh, this is rather unpleasant.” It's something like 30% of what it was.
And I am smiling.
Really, I am.
I dropped by the library to pick up a CD I had requested (three months on the waiting list!) and I just now got up and did a little dance to the music. I feel that much better.
It feels so wonderful not to hurt so much.
Now that is an odd thing, isn’t it? I have a headache. There is a slight throbbing behind my temple, an ache persistent and relentless, but there is such a difference between yesterday’s pain and today’s I feel almost giddy.
I started an after school club today, ten kids in attendance. I taught them for an hour and allowed them to practice the engineering principles I introduced for another hour. Track that for a moment. I have a headache, I added an extra two hours of work to my day, making a commitment to continue it through the end of the year at least once a week, and I am happy, happy, happy.
We can live in such uncomfortable situations that a slight relief can be true joy.
I had a meeting with someone today about the infrastructure of a large website I am building for my community.
She and I have tried to have this meeting several times but something always interfered. But today we were able to get together. We talked about my church. She is checking it out and sat behind me the other day (we hadn’t met yet so we didn’t know to make the connection at the time).
She commented about my worship style (a touch more demonstrative than most).
When I worship I feel such joy. It is one time each week that I am guaranteed to be able to push out the distractions of the world and open my heart fully. I don’t care what anyone else is thinking or doing, I am communing with my maker.
It is a time of true exultation for me.
That is a delicious thing.
Keep in mind I am a human being. Remember I am prone to thinking about myself, my needs, my wants, my desires, first, before all else.
But during this time each Sunday (and others of course, but always then), I focus on someone else enough that I can feel something beyond my own sphere of five senses.
And I feel euphoric.
So... for much of my life, I am worried about IEPs, and 504s, and No Child left Behind, and ESIS, and YST (and a never ending alphabet soup of educationalese) and I can get pulled far away from that joy.
“Doc, my soul hurts when I do this!”
And the master physician says:
“Well, don’t do that.”
When the hurting gets just a little relief we can feel like dancing.
Oh, oh my...
Some day I will be living in such pure joy! I will be dancing with my first child in my arms. I will be hugging my grandmother, and my sister, and singing directly face to face to my Lord. Such joy beyond imagining!
We will all be moving away from the joys of simple relief to eternal, immortal true joy.